COLLEGE.

Ahh, so I am FINALLY out on my own...and I loveee loveee loveee it! :) My room is amazing and my roommates are pretty cool :)

So me and two of my roommates (kathy and ellen) went to mcdonalds last night at like 10:30 lol. Well we orders 3 meals. And before we left the guy asked another worker if they had put the fries in there. Well we had just took off, thank God we werent outta the parking lot because kathy looked in the bag and there was nothing BUT fries! haha, they had left out the burgers! So we reversed the whole way back and had to get our burgers. It was hilarious!

Tonight is "Late Night at the Rec" and its supposed to be superrr fun! :) I'm really excited because basically the whole campus is supposed to be going. I'll post later to tell you how it went.

Okay so the whole thing with Jaime. Being away from eachother sucksss. But I'm positive that we can make it. It'll be tough but I'm not gonna let our relationship suffer because I'm gone. I'll be home on the 3rd! :)

Oh, and its soooo great not having your parents around telling you what to do! :D

Gonna Prove 'Em Wrong.

So apparently some people think its their business to decide how long me and Jaime will last once I go to college. And you know what I think...stay the hell outta our business. Stop hating on our relationship. Just because we have had a longer one and are actually making it work, doesn't mean that you have to be rude. Some people think, wow you're over exaggerating when you cry about leaving. You know what, fuck you! You have nooo idea how it feels to leave the one you love, no matter if its 2 hours away or not. I'm so tired of people not believing in us. I'm gonna prove all of y'all wrong. And if we don't work out, then don't you dare come up to me and say anything. Because its MY business and not yours so get that through your thick ass heads. And yes, me and Jaime have been through probably more fights than most couples. But we get over them and most of them are for stupid little picky reasons. And then 20 minutes later, we're fine. Our relationship isn't perfect and I'm so glad for that. If it was, I would be bored outta my mind. We don't know how long we're gonna last because we can't tell the future, and no one else can either. So no matter if you think you can, you can't dumbass. All we know is that whether we're dating or just friends, we will always be in each others lives.

Agenda for the next three days:

•  Tomorrow: Make cupcakes and brownies for party. Pack most of my clothes up and little things that I don't really need. Have a BADASS time at my party :) Oh and if I normally talk to you and I didn't get a chance to tell you about it, then you better be there :) haha. It's gonna start around 7ishh or 8ishh.
• Thursday: Pack all of my stuff up and load it into the car. Watch the football scrimmage in Pearsall. Spend the night at my mimi's house in devine.
• Friday: MOVE IN :D

Emotional Wreck

My emotions are like a train wreck. Tonight I couldn't stop crying. Like for every little thing, I started tearing up. I'm on my period so I thought maybe it was because of my hormones. But I've never gotten this emotional during that time. I'm pretty sure that its because I'm leaving and having to say bye in three days. OMG. I have no idea what I'm going to do. I'm having a party at my house on Wednesday night as a "going away to college and last summer thing". I have no idea how I'm going to be able to cope with saying bye. And the worst thing is that I absolutely hate letting people see me cry. One, because under my eyes gets all red and splotchy and its not attractive at all. And two, because it makes me feel weak with no control. My good friend Abran told me today that I shouldn't say "good bye" because I'm not really leaving everyone. I mean I'm moving out of town and going to college, but it's more like a "see ya later" kinda thing.

For instance, tonight me and Jaime were just sitting there at my house watching his anime shows on my laptop. He always picks at me and I know hes kidding so normally it doesn't bother me. But omg tonight I got all emotional and basically got all butt hurt for no apparent reason. And then my eyes would start tearing up. You know what I think about crying when I don't want to, its GAY. And then when I dropped him off at his house we were saying bye. And it was just like "bye" as in "i'll see you tomorrow" and I started bawling. Ugh it's almost uncontrollable. I'm a complete emotional wreck. If I'm crying now I have no idea how I'm going to be able to say "bye" to him. And especially since the last time I will see him for a while will be after his football scrimmage on Thursday. Gahh, isn't that embarrassing, crying in front of all the guys.

Emotions are gayer than a guy that wears skinny jeans and makeup! 

Short and Sweet.

Okay so the funniest thing happened yesterday. My boyfriend and I were shopping for clothes for him. He is the MOST indecisive person, ever. We went back and forth between stores sooo many times. He's worse than I am. Well anyways, we're looking for shirts for him. He wears a medium so hes looking for "M's". Well he sees "SM" on one shirt and he says "what does that stand for, Smedium?" (meaning small and medium for those of yall that are a little bit slow lol) and I was like " hahahahaha, NO. it means SMALL." he then feels dumb, haha. Which I think is great because he always makes me feel dumb! :)

I have exactly four days until I officially move out of brackettville, texas! :) Ahh, I am very excited. The one thing that I hope my apartment has is VERY GOOD water pressure. I absolutely hateee taking showers with low water pressure.

And once AGAIN my ac is out at my house. WTF. Thank God that my house actually has fairly good ventilation with the windows open. You would think that the stupid creepy worker dudes would fix it the first time, but I'm guessing that they dont know jack about ac's!

Sorry this one is short, I will have more to say later on :)

Blah Blah Blah.

I really need to learn how to use money more wisely. But the sad thing is that I always try to find deals. Ugh I'm really realizing that spending money sucks, especially since its my OWN money. And now that I have to pay for my own gas, I don't even want to go anywhere anymore lol. It cost me 40 dollars to fill up on gas.

Getting my ears pierced makes me want my cartilage pierced now haha. And I can't wait for my tattoo. I have a feeling that its going to hurt really bad, but oh well. It'll be the great adrenaline rush! :D

Ugh, I'm so tired of being so nice to everyone. Especially when they piss me off. I really used to be a hugee bitch but somehow I'm starting to have no back bone. That shit needs to change. I mean yeah its not right to be rude to people, but it sucks letting them walk all over you. So dumb..

So today I took my brother out to eat. Except my parents paid for his meal lol. But anyways, he had fried catfish and shrimp. Well we took it to go after he couldn't finish it. I specifically told him to hold onto it so that he wouldn't spill it. What does he do? spill it, ALL over the floor of my car. I therefore got mad and made him take all the crumbs out without using a vacuum cleaner haha. My brother is growing up so fast, it makes me feel old. He's gotten to the stage where he actually tries to look nice and smell good. For me, its great because now I no longer have to smell his stinky boy odor. Ha, just kidding he doesn't always smell, just sometimes haha.

I'm really excited to leave for college next thursday. However, I will miss my boyfriend terribly. Who knows what is going to happen between us while I'm gone. But I'm going to try my hardest to make it work. A lot of people say, oh you'll meet a lot of great guys..way better than Jaime..in college. But hey, Jaime is a pretty great guy and I really don't care what you think, thanks. Get out of my business. :)

Nonsense.

Today I got my ears pierced! Well for a second time, now I have two earring holes on each ear. To my dad he thinks..now you have to buy more earrings. Okay, i dont care? ha. Anyways, I was scared that it might hurt really bad. But getting my eyebrows waxed hurts worse. Considering that it really didnt hurt too bad getting my ears pierced, I think that I'm ready for my tattoo. :) Officially, my dad has said okay to it!

Watching the COWBOYS game! TWO WORDS.....Miles Austin <3

Saturday I am going to go camping. I'm not sure whether or not to be excited about it or not. I actually like it because I can be around all of my friends :) Hopefully, I am not the only girl haha. Well anyways, today me, Jaime, Manny, and Adrian went walking along the trails to find out where we were going to camp at. Guess what shoes I happened to be wearing?...flip flops. And every step I took hurt like a bitch. I officially hate rocks and twigs. Did the guys have sympathy for me? NOPE. And yes, I might sound like a really girly girl right now...but trust me, I'm not. I was just having a simple girl moment haha. My boyfriend kept trying to make me walk faster. My pace of walking is wayy slower than his pace of walking. I practically had to run to keep up with him. So there I am, sweating like a pig with mosquitoes swarming around my legs. Apparently there is something in my blood, that they LOVE. Anyways, I cant wait to go camping! :) I'm bringing a tonnn of mosquito spray!

I'm not sure if it is legal for policemen to speed on the highway without their lights on or not. But today our stupid "kinney county police force that think they're the swat team" decided to ride my ass on the way home from Del Rio today. He didnt have his lights on so I didn't pull over. Well apparently I was going too slow for him...I was going 70, the speed limit. He proceeded to pass me and go probably about 80-90 mph down the highway without lights flashing. I don't think that is legal. Oh and I cant stand Semi truck drivers. They are dumbasses! They think that just because they have a hugeee truck that they can go where ever they want. Today one decided to pass two BIG dump trucks driving on the side of the road. When he passed them, he was ALL the way into my lane. It might as well have been HIS lane, which I'm sure he thought it was. Needless to say, I had to drive almost in the grass. I was honking my horn the whole time and flipping him off. :) Ahh, today has been a great day...NOT. 

Orientation and Misc.

So I just got back from orientation. It was superrr fun! But there were some downsides. The best thing was our OLs (orientation leaders), they were hilarious! Our OL lied about, EVERYTHING. Haha they made orientation really fun. The one thing that sucked was walking in the hot sun, luckily our OL didn't like walking in the sun so he made us stay in the shade :) We also had to sit in an auditorium for a whole afternoon, learning about...NOTHING ha. I listened to a whole lecture on Jack London, and I still have no clue who he is. We learned there were people in our dorm/apartment that were not 21 or older then we couldn't have alcohol. I mean seriously, what college student is going to listen to that?

I met some interesting people there. A girl that talked wayy too much for her own good, no doubt lying about everything she was saying and always sucking up to the OLs. A guy that thought it was his point to make sure that everyone knew that he was gay. Look dude, we don't care. You're gay, okay. We can tell by looking at you, theres no need for you to tell us. I met a cool girl though, she was really nice. We ate lunch together so we didn't have to look like lame-o's eating lunch alone.

I got all my classes in order. I have class MWF and a lab early on Tuesday morning. Thursdays I'm off. :) I thought I was going to get shitty classes because I registered so late, but I basically didn't. Oh and so yesterday me and my mom had to kill time from 8:30am to 3:00pm. We went and toured the rec center. I found out that they can give you a fitness test and tell you basically how in shape you are and what you can do to change it. Well that sounds great...you can tell me that I'm fat and out of shape. No thanks ha. I'll stick to my big butted self and work out on my own. We can also get free personal trainers. Which I actually thought about but knowing me I would get the bootcamp person and get yelled at 24/7. No thanks, already went through that. Thats why I am no longer in athletics and why I got out as fast as I could after softball. :) haha.

Small Towns & Reminiscing.

Small towns...where everyone knows everyone. And I'm not kidding. Also where there is nothing to do, ever. In our town its either swim at the pool, party, cruise, or just hang out at someones house. There isn't a mall or a "cool hang out place". Well there is the "teen center", which I have no idea why they call it that when hardly any teenagers go. Its mostly the little kids and its about as fun as getting a shot in the butt by a really weird looking nurse.

Speaking of little kids..I cant stand when you're in a store and kids are running around everywhere without their parents. Or they are screaming and crying because they cant have their way. I'm just like seriously? TAKE CARE OF YOUR KIDS. or like my mother...take them to the restroom and spank them ha. Now a days parents don't believe in spankings. No wonder there are soooo many discipline problems. Putting them in "time out" doesn't work. Now I don't mean beat your kids, because that's not right. But a good spanking every now and then when its needed, does the job.

I was reminiscing earlier with my parents about my childhood. I almost caught the microwave on fire by putting a poptart...with the aluminum wrapper...in it. I swallowed my first tooth by trying to bite into a fake ice cream cone. I then proceeded to tell the grown ups that it had fell out somewhere so they spent hours looking for it. My two cousins and I used to call each other "caca heads" all the time. My aunt was not happy with us, she would get extremely pissed. All we thought it meant was "poop" but later on I found out that it meant "shit". No wonder she was mad. I remember telling the superintendent's daughter, "my dad doesn't like your dad" not realizing that it could've gotten my dad fired. Needless to say, I was grounded for a VERY long time and I was only in first grade. My boyfriend makes fun of me...but the worst I have been ever grounded was when my parents took away my books! I feel like such a nerd when I say that, but I love reading ha. 

Anyways, reminiscing is fun :) 

People Change.

This is gonna be a more serious blog. But please still feel free to read it. :)

Well over the years I've realized that people change. Even the people that you thought were your "best friends" change. And even you change personally. Therefore people grow older and some grow apart. Some people just get tired of the same old thing and want something new. Recently, with the help of Jaime, I've realized that I let people walk all over me. Instead of telling them straight up that they treat me like shit...I dont. Basically the only person I tell straight up, is Jaime. He hates that I let people walk all over me and he would really like to tell them where to shove it...haha but I wont let him. I'm a big girl and I can fight my own battles. It seems to me that since I've been dating Jaime, I've gained and lost some friends. Which doesnt particularly bother me because the friends that I've gained are amazinggg! :) But it seems that I've been left out of a certain group just because I like spending time with my boyfriend. Honestly, I'm sure I'm not the only girl in this world that likes to hang out with guys more than girls. Yes, it may seem like I'm a "whore". But please, think past it because I'm very far from it. I just hateeee dealing with girl drama. It's so much nonsense and yes, I catch myself getting involved with it every now and then. But I slowly back away. Anyways, people change and I've realized that one of my closest friends has changed. And maybe I have been the one to change, but I'm not sure. I get used and it sucks. And yeah they probably will deny it all the way, but its the truth. The straight out truth and I'm soooo tired of it. If you're reading this and you think its you, it probably is. 

But on a less serious note...I can not stand when guys leave the toilet seat up. I mean seriously? How hard is it to just put it down? I mean yes, women have been complaining about this for years and yeah we could just as easily put it down. But are we the ones that left it up? NO. So put the dang toilet seat down.

And there is this guy that works out at the adult center about the same time I do. He has super jacked arms and little scrawny legs. And you wanna know what I think about that?...I think that guys with super jacked arms are trying to compensate for something that their lacking else where. haha.

Odd things.

Ok so, I've decided that I want a tattoo. A lot of people tell me that it gets addicting, so don't do it. But I'm not one of those dumbasses that get tons and tons of  meaningless tattoos. I've had a tattoo in mind since I was probably 13. It's hard to explain but I want it in memory of my mother, who passed away when I was almost 2 years old. And yes it might be a shock to some people that "Mrs. Swilley" is not my real mother. But she isnt, get over it. I'm half hispanic even though you can't really tell. Apparently my entire mexican family has to be extremely light skinned. Therefore, I don't look at all like I'm mexican. Well, except for my curvy hips...yeah thanks mom for that. Anyways, back to my tattoo..my parents are actually okay with it. :)

I've recently realized that I have a big fear of plumbers and electricians...or whoever else needs to come into my house to fix things. They freak me out! They are always the creepy old guys that you think are always looking at you. Or they ask you weird questions...I'm just like "hey how bout you go get to work on what you need to do and leave me the hell alone". I'm always scared that the creepy dudes are gonna rape me or something. I have no idea how I'm going to survive in college when I see creepy people like that. 

Eghh speaking of creepy people. I'm sure I am not the only person that gets freaked out by people with HUGEEE gages in their ears. I mean sure a small one, okay thats fine. But the ones where I could fit my whole fist through your earlobe...thats disgusting! And I've heard that your earlobe starts to smell. GROSS! Seriously people, get some normal earrings! Or dont let them get that big.

I really wish I was a better cook. I think I really need to start learning. I mean I can cook a few things, but come on...my boyfriend cooks better than me! Thats not cool haha. My new goal...besides becoming a beast at guitar hero haha...is to learn how to cook better! :)

Realizations/ First Blog.

Ahh, so I've come to realize that life after high school is ah-mazinggg. Way less drama...I don't have to deal with all of those people that I really hated seeing everyday at school. Oh and NO MORE TWO A DAYS! I am so glad not to be screamed at every second for not being fast enough. I'm not sure if she ever realized but...I have a lot more attached to my backside than most of the little skinny girls! lol. I have an ass and it slows me down quite a bit haha. I however have decided that I will NOT gain the "freshman 15". So I try to work out everyday. And it actually feels good not to be yelled at 24/7 lol.

It does get quite boring however. I have never spent this much time with my family, EVER. I think I might just shoot my father ha. Some days that man annoys the shitttt out of me. And my mother will not stop asking me questions! I swear she asks the same question three or four times. I finally told her yesterday: mother, you're pissing me the fck off, stop asking me so many questions! I know that I will miss them when I leave but they know how to push my buttons. On a more positive note, I've never been this close to my family. :)

I'm new to all this blogging stuff. But I thought it would be a good idea to do once I'm in college. It'll be kind of like a stress reliever.

p.s. I have finally learned to play guitar hero with using the buttons instead of just the strummer! haha.